Mastering social etiquette in a foreign country is already a minefield — you don’t need to make it worse by accidentally offending the locals. Nobody wants to be that tourist, the one who cluelessly sabotages their own trip with an accidental blunder. In the Netherlands, an innocent question might get you iced out. And flash what you think is a harmless American gesture in Greece, and suddenly, you’ve insulted someone without even meaning to. But perhaps the most baffling etiquette quirk? Sweden, a country that consistently ranks among the happiest in the world, doesn’t even have a word for “please.”
Yes, you read that right. In the Swedish language, there’s no magic word to sweeten your requests. This surprising omission probably fuels the stereotype that Swedes are a bit blunt or even unfriendly, especially to visitors from more please-and-thank-you cultures. In fact, foreigners sometimes report feeling downright offended, especially considering how much of our everyday politeness revolves around that single word. What’s more, according to a survey by The Local Sweden, the lack of “please” has even derailed romantic prospects for many Swedes, with foreigners finding Swedish bluntness borderline offensive.
If your next trip is to Sweden, you’re probably wondering how to order your morning coffee without sounding like a demanding diva. But don’t worry — you won’t have to resort to elaborate charades just to communicate certain requests. Although the Swedish language skips out on “please,” locals have their own nuanced methods for expressing politeness and respect. Knowing them means you’ll survive — and maybe even thrive — in the land of ABBA and IKEA.
How to convey politeness when you’re in Sweden
Just because Swedish doesn’t have a direct word for “please” doesn’t mean you’ll get side-eyed for using it. In fact, many Swedes speak excellent English, with Sweden even ranking fourth in the EF English Proficiency Index. If you slip in an English “please” every so often, no one’s going to clutch their pearls. But if you’re dead set on blending in and want to stick to Swedish, there are ways to sound polite without needing Google Translate.
The closest Swedish word to “please” is “tack,” which, luckily, is pronounced exactly as it looks. But before you start tack-ing your way through Sweden, snälla is technically another way to say “please,” though it’s reserved for when you’re outright begging — like pleading for mercy, not politely ordering a cardamom bun. So, unless you want to sound desperate over a plate of köttbullar, stick to “tack.” For example, if you’re ordering a coffee, just say “en kaffe, tack,” and you’re golden. But don’t overdo it by throwing “tack” and “snälla” together. Apparently, excessive politeness in Sweden can actually come off as weirdly pushy. “Tacking on ‘snälla’ for any random and normal request makes you sound kind of desperate,” Swedish local u/quantum-shark on the r/Svenska subreddit noted. “Overthanking someone is bordering on rude in swedish, it makes people uncomfortable. ‘Tack’ is almost always your safest bet when you want to be polite.”
So there you have it. Now you can roam the land of fairytale castles, national parks, and trendsetting cities without sounding like you’re desperately pleading for toast skagen.
